Is it or Isn't it?

A woman and I were sharing our daily updates..,I informed her that I was going stir crazy.., I was desperate to do something ..,

She replied that she was staying home..., she texted that she was at a club

this is where I get conflicted.., is it insensitive of her not to include me.., or

It is not her  responsibility to entertain me

Jumping Out Of My Skin

I feel like I am going out of my skin..,, feeling like sugar will be the key to my serenity.., a form of aloe if  you will ....

I asked myself, if not now then when.., to act on creating long term gratification instead of short term gratification

That would be the real key to serenity

Singer

I attended a multi media art festival ..... People were milling around and talking....in front of the

mobile crowd, a woman sang..

I admired her determination and self belief to have not hesitated or distracted by the atmospere

"So Easily"

I was watching a man dance on a fake wood floor... He caught my eye while he was saddled on a bar stool... his unscathed skin glistened in the mood lighting 

He swiveled his joints like his feet were adhered to a lazy Susan ..., a girl motioned towards him and they complemented each other with relaxed physical chemistry ... 

I did not think I could be her  "so easily" because it would done "so easily" by me 

Change Day

I will think of how I let my thoughts get in my way.., my response will be that the next day will be a new day... New opportunity to change..  then when I don't I wonder if I will know how

" Misery"

Harsh self descriptions slip out of my mouth... to naturally ..... I go to work looking like Kathy Bates from "Misery"

   It can give me pause that I can be so insulting about the most person in my life

Friendship Gardening

                 Friendships require tending 

Harangue

A man started yelling at me, in the middle of a restaurant, I felt free during his whole harangue. Each of his attacks were mentally met with an example of how I was free of him ..

When he yelled of me, during my youth, I only felt trapped... Determined I had no way out ...

I wish I was as fervent about how to become empowered

Two women Talking

 Two women were discussing aspects of their work place... The female listener made  a  low slow raspberry sound with her lips.... She said it was the sound of her spirit deflating

Out of Bed

I will become positive that the emotional marathons I have advanced have advanced me .., then their
are certain mornings I will lay in bed feeling like I have not progressed beyond my bed

Culinary Review

I found  two dead bugs in my apartment .... Is this a review of cooking?

Heart of a Humanity

I work in a call center that serves 14 states. Callers relay their life stories... Reducing costs to create the proceeds to bury her husband..., the first time he lived alone after a series of marriages.., an Islamic woman that told me how her religion colored her family

My headphones are a front row seat the heart of humanity

Nail Color

While I waited for a manicurist in an Asian salon ... I asked an American mother and daughter to pick out my nail polish color... In the event of alliance building

Required Reading

I am comprising a list of books to send to a man .. He is awaiting trial ..

I am thinking of puting, "In Cold Blood", at the top of list

Anything, Anytime

Reduced salt intake by reducing potato chip intake was a focus

I discovered if I engage in the purchasing of the chips, as a side to my sandwich, then give the bag
away ..,,. I will not miss them

I need to know that I can have  any food anytime

Jail Bird

A jail bird called me... He finished by the call by saying:

"I appreciate you ... I tell everyone about you.., I love you"

I responded: " everyday, in grade school, I would wish to be loved by a man living in the
big house"

Demotion or promotion ?

I was anxious about my lack sales as a call center agent.., I was pulled into a meeting... Asigned to a "special project"

Thought it was the perfect shake up .. ..  It was dropped on me that the project was for low sellers ..,

Their demotion is my promotion

Beyond Food

I was paid. I paid a bill. Reacted by questioning myself, " take out from what restaurant? Italian or Chinese?"

My answer was, "expand my life through acts beyond food".....

Vanity

I asked a woman how she got up for a 5:30 am class

She answered: Vanity

Slow Whisper

I have come to realize that my small talk could be duplicated for the  gentle instruction of a hospice nurse ..,It's almost over.., am I talking loud? Then I lower my voice to a slow whisper .... Always offering to read out loud to people ....

I am going to make myself comfortable

Public Refuge

I used to be freaked by the hancicapped stall ... Now they are my refuge ... On my work breaks,
I take my phone into the larger stall and text... Or read zine articles .. Leave voice mails

Public Kindness

Whenever I take public transport .., I become inspired by the kindness shared by strangers

About Food

I used to obsess about eating as much as I can.... eating food I did not like... I am now obsessing to strive to eat less

Strangely

A person and I texted several hours a day for a year and half ...,I stopped texting him ... he has not
appeared to notice.... Instead of sad I feel strangely relieved

By Crack of Light

There have been nights when I have gone from
the restlessness of my bed to eating peanut butter
by the crack of the fridge door light

Most recently, after a similar trip from bed to fridge... I weeded food  and replanted it
in the gargage

It gave me hope

"Finally"

Weight gain resembled my t-shirts into Plaster  of Paris shells.... The starting of my work
shift would reintroduce me to my discomfort with the (re) expansion of my body..,

I broke down and purchased better fitting clothes... I wore the new threads to work..,I

was convinced that people exhale "finally"

not a peep

Golden Elephant

I was whipping through a plus size rack of  cotton t-shirts. Acting fast and pessimistly, I discover an oatmeal colored cotton t-shirt with a gold elephant on the front...,

Interesting choice

Certain Dispositions

I am working in den of  dusk level darkness... I craft a neutrally worded sentence... and it will boomerang in a negative assumption of my behavior...

It makes me wonder if places attract certain dispositions ...

Even Those We Have not Met

I interacted with a manager regarding the crushing of
my instinct.., by a handful of supervisors ...

He appeared dismayed... He partnered his disappointment with the verbalized thought:

"That reminds me, I need to remind people to not
go against their instincts"

We are effecting people we have not met

Big Girl

The deli man loudly greeted me: "want to make u
happy, Big Girl"

Somehow I do not feel celebrated

Looking Up

I can be gripped by first impressions and people's response to them

It was perfect timing... The elevator doors opened when  I approached ... A man's eyewear caught
my eyes... Admiring them generated my frequently under-stated smile...,

He looked up as if he sensed it and smiled back

Eternal Anger

I am becoming more aware of my eternal anger.  It began to display it self to me when I became to ready to snap at a woman when she started to advise instead of sympathize with one of my stories

My theory for lessening the anger is to ride the wave, notice my reaction after being with someone and do not let  it be an excuse to mistreat  myself or others

Nail Techician

My posture personified my work place tensions. I splurged for a manicure..., the nail technician massaged my arms...

I began to cry... It felt like the more her fingers put pressure on my pores the more my grief was being
released through them

Drinking

Whenever I reveal an unfortunate childhood memory, to a woman, she will ask:

"Was that in relation to your father's drinking"

The question always catches me off guard... I have no bad memories

of my father's drinking

Good Question

A woman suggested that the only dumb question  I could ask is ... Is the question I do not ask

Time Remains

One of my behaviors can inhibit another one of my behaviors....

A need for male approval can block out free will

Sucked in self doubt thwarts the  success that stems from following instincts

Unhealthy filling of my emptiness minimizes the strength that partners with
confidence

My story is not over

My Lady

The hansey deli man held my elbow while greeting: 

"Good morning my lady" -   

Captive

I am starting to receive calls from a prisoner... I have always wanted a captive listener..

In Three Years

I met a woman's daughter three years ago.  She had a panic attack when she guested on a San Diego trip.

This summer, she attended a medical career focused camp and was not home sick ... She asked to 

attend the camp

Walked Towards Accomplishment

Everyday, last year, I would hear a man reveal what he wanted and y he would not
get it...

Next week, he is starting a job of his choice .., in a newly leased car .. He is thinking of dating

He announced his intention and began to methodically walk towards accomplishment step by step

Natural Success

The more my anxiety melts away the more positive results are garnered in the work place

The more positive results the less I eat...

Instead

Fear is being reflected in a change of eating habits...

Instead of asking if I am hungry or what do I want?....  I ask myself,  How much food
is available?...

Natural Power

A woman informed me that I melted her fear of talking in public... I did it by being myself... Naturally remarking on her  personal power

Victorious effects... One person at a time

Humanist

I have a long term relationship with a woman. She is a humanist. She does not believe  in GOD... or  something larger then ourselves... Things being meant to be or the Power of Intention

She believes in the Power of Keeping Going  and ultimately that we are alone

I, both, envy and feel sadness for her

Tongue

The deli man gets handsey with me... Maybe he had just prepared tongue

Her Result

A woman was fired in front of me. It started to creep me out... I started  to compare ourselves

Then I stopped myself.., we are two different people..... Her result is not mine

Vow

We must vow to be kinder to ourselves

Easy Listening

The hard core Rock N Roll of my youth is, now, considered
"Easy Listening"

White Wine

I informed a woman of  my bad behaviors while drinking ... White wine was offered

Singled Out

It is crazy...It comes in waves.. I can feel a twinge when my daily call compliments a mutual acquaintance ...

I can feel discounted when he compliments her

An example of overthinking

Violence

A mother described the violence between her son and daughter. I shot back to asking my mother for protection from my brother..,

"What about anger management"     "What about therapy"

She is doing the same as my mother... Nothing

Mountain Top

A man informed me that he thinks of my words whenever he hikes to the top of a mountain...

We never know when our words effect others

Comfort Food

Cable channels are a new version of comfort food

Can't go Changin

A man wardrobes, himself, in sadness..., disappointment that has become a part of him like a limp... He expresses his affliction in one liners.., when I hear it I start to cry..,

His sentences are opportunities for me to learn to let him be.... I can not fix him.., Jason
does not want me to change him only to listen

Demanding Mistresss

Self doubt is time inefficient. The lack of self belief demands that I seek the opinions of multiple people...,  stopping what I am doing to call.. to confirm with colleague...or freeze


Only to discover my first thought was the right one..

Dreary

A man, on a Saturday, asked me out for the following Sunday. He suggested dancing....

or going somewhere to talk... I opted for dancing... Talking sounded dreary

Fridge or Cabinets

Do you open your fridge .... and think I need to cook that... Nagged by expiration dates

My story is about eggs... I looked at them for  ten days.., I scrambled the eggs today

My eggs were consumed along with the nagging

Which Package?

A man asked me out....

Man: do u want to go to dancing?

Me: do you have cable? Bravo? Do you live alone?


Man: yes..  I have cable and live alone...

Me: why don't we hang out on Sunday... I will watch cable



Which package I am interested depends on the day

Wagon

I walk and my clothes fit differently. My sadness was revealed to a friend...,

She said: you slipped off the wagon and you are getting back on

I can go along with that

Window

The type of window I have on the world... Dictates my life in it..,

Less Bleeding

A benefit of spending less  time with chaotic people  is that
less of their chaos  bleeds into your life

Shim self

A  peaceful relationship is  knowing the selected person is being shim self and that your partner knows you are shim self .., neither is taking it personally

Ring of Trees

I threw my mother's ashes among the highest points of a ring of trees.  The trees were selected in response to her love of trees.

The collection of trees grow behind  a friend's restaurant. ....  A woman pointed out .. I have a bucolic 
living space to visit my mother 

Soccer Ball

I was sitting in the guest room, of a grade school friend, watching a DVD. Her son was kicking a soccer ball outside window.,,

The  TV was turned off in favor of passing the ball with the boy..,

It is always better to live life then watch life

One stone at a time

I know a man that wears his emptiness like an elbow patch. I was convinced that each of my texted compliments would have the weight of a stone returning to fill up his quarry of sadness.

The  amount of the words..., telling him how sexy he was ,., how smart he was, how good he was.., how accomplished he was..,,  negated the believing of them

I liberated myself of the practice and our communication drastically improved

Only Now

I have been  doing less. The texts I exchange with a man are shorter and less complimentary. I stopped
asking a woman to hang out.

The results came fast. The man's texts became smarter and playful. The woman asked me to the movies during the first 24 hours of my  stopped requests .

Doing less was chanted to me while growing up... I am ready to make the change

Raw Bravery

A man was describing a scene from his love life... A girl rejected his kiss.., it was bad timing

He said, " it was a low point and I just want to forget it"

Tears were my reaction to his  verbal form of raw bravery

Blocking Emotional Numbers

I was feeling fearful and empty.   My state of mind nearly weakened my self control.

For a few moments, I thought my only diversion was to text a couple of choice males..,,

Assessing that I would become emptier after contacting them blocked their emotional number on me

Lost and Found

I have left my home with the  specific purpose of being "Found"..,  
being found by the one person that will pull together, all, my life's loose ends...

 I longer have this goal, when I go out, because I no longer feel lost

In seven Minutes

My turning around in the soup isle, at " my market", put me face to face with a well- groomed
customer.., perfect shade of lipstick., commanding eye-wear.., naturally coiffed hair

I exclaimed: "your make-up is skillfully applied"
Her: "Oh, this took 7 minutes"

How can we , all, improve our lives seven minutes a day.

Calling a cheerleading friend.... Throwing  one thing away..,, reading a few pages in newly started book

"I am Fifty"

A woman informed me that while she views me as a kind, comforting person ..., when she ( first) met me, she thought I said outrageous things...

This is a woman that asked me if I was still getting my period, the previous day

Perhaps I should start coloring my hair

Band-Aid Love

In the past, I would always respond to an ex-boy friend's calls.   I did not want to  release our bond or eliminate the sexual option from my back burner...

Then I had a moment of clarity...,    When I continue to open the door for an
ex-lover ... I am continuing to shut the door on a long term ( over all) satisfying
 relationship

Uncompromised

A woman and I were taking a class together..., we had only exchanged pleasantries until one
day when we sat together...

Woman: u do not have kids..

Me: how would u know that?

Woman: because your whole being feels uncompromised

Scampering Off

I find , with certain people, that once I am done  purging details of my most recent dramatic development....

and they start to talk about themselves ..,, I can not even fake interest ... and scamper off the phone

as quickly as I can 

Treasured

A woman and I discuss her "romantic" relationship.... She tells stories that...if true..,seem capable of 

crushing the human spirit...

The hearing of stories has proven to be an unintentional motivator to work towards relationships of a highest level 

People  that treasure me 

Stalling

This must have happened to u..,?!  A person making small talk ( with you) while you are in a public
bathroom stall... It usually starts near the sink... After entering the bathroom.., then I become horrified when the words do not magically stop when we grasp for the stall door...

I can not stall any later... I must start telling these party poopers  that I can not be a party to their flush of words

Nevering

I am guilty of nevering myself ....  "I will never move from Phoenix"

"I will never find a stable job that embodies my talents"..,, "I may never be a person that gets up, in time, to apply make up and blow out my hair prior to work"  "I may never stop craving Chinese food"

"I may never write a book"

It is an uneducated form of self communication ..  The more I define myself by "nevers" then the less
I will do

Trying new things creates opportunities for less "nevering"

Still Explaining

Years ago, I had sex with a male friend.,,

I am, still, explaining ( to him) that I am not gay

Cheap Wine

A man and I were hosting a dinner party... Most of the prep work was completed...

Me: shouldn't we open the wine ... To let it breathe...

Man: not with cheap wine

Textual relationship

I have a textual "relationship" with a father.... At the end  of hours of texting... He would sign off by
keying " Good Night, dear"

It always made me feel warm and safe... I figured it was further evidence of neediness...then it hit me

My father would come into room during ,most of my youth, with those duplicate words

John Denver

I engaged in a work excerise ....

Male Worker: I am always glad to be available to help members of my team..,

Me: You are like a John Denver song ..,

Male Worker: U know I am 20... So I will not have heard of the same people U have


There was one thing that tied our two generations together... Listening
to Queen's  "The Champions" prior to sports games

Vacancy of Malice

I had dinner with a man and a woman... The woman has less marbles then most of us ... Her life is one long unfortunate senior moment.... I was stacking nervously chattered word upon word...

The man scolded, "you are talking to fast... You are fustrating her"

In that moment, I decided I will not continue to feel
bad for behavior that will not remembered by the recipient and has
a vacancy of malice

Signal

A signal for change could be my switching my hostess treat selection because I did not
want to bend lower for my more desired choice..,

Becoming Clean

It clicked... Jekyll and Hyde has been the story of the men of both my family life and social life...

Their loving Jekyll side would fertilize my amnesia for their hostile 

Hyde side and plant my feet wherever their feet were... 

Stamina has washed over me.., becoming clean in the knowledge I can wait for a good person 

that will be consistent

Anymore

A classmate publicly attacked my looks ... My usual tears did not come

Maybe I am not that effected girl any more

Ripped Awning

I have listened to a lot of boring people in the name of male  approval...

This annoying need hung over me like a ripped awning flapping in the wind

Starting to release my remaining human shreds of male approval has made me
sort of excited

Man in the Mirror

Every morning, my manager plays "Man in the Mirror" sung by Michael Jackson..,
I use it as an opportunity to reflect on my goals.. Asking myself in what ways
I want to be better .., do better ..,

Every Color

I am outgrowing a man..... Phasing out daily communication.., I decided not to engage

in certain habits of escape .... I want to be alert for every color of my grief

Pieces of Art

A woman was describing her work-outs.... Looking at her friend, she proclaimed:

"Bodies are pieces of art"

Feed

I asked my parents a lot of questions ... Ranging from their song to the operation of their plumbing

My parents lost their marbles at the same time.... Frequently, a memory will trigger a question about their view of an experience

Dad, were you mortified when you bought me tampons? Were you on autopilot when you were at
counter?

Mom, how did you survive your father's dementia?

Feed your curiosity about your family with questions

Daily

Daily, I am training myself to like something about myself as easily as finding a quality to loath
about myself

Certain Moments

Success, during certain moments of our lives, can be defined by functioning

Free Sunday

A neighbor and I were discussing free cultural events one Saturday night:

Me: do u want to go to the Irish Cultural center ... Tomorrow ... it's free

Neighbor : so is church.... What about your salvation?

Me: let me know about the Irish Cultural Center?

Go in the Direction of the Skid

Water was spilled on a company break room floor. A woman slipped and skidded onto the floor... I became overcome with laughter

I was disappointed in my reaction ... I had always prided myself in not liking physical comedy

Rope Lengths

My neighbor was sewing a dress while on her couch... Her toddler was crying in the background
She looked out the window and said "I am going push myself off a building" ..it was almost chilling


Her daughter is in preschool until the last possible minute ... The woman backed up her statement with " I listen to crying and yelling all day"

Ropes have different lengths

"You Don't Listen"

I am enduring a work probation .... I am receptive and verbalize a welcoming esprit for all advice on how to do and be better in presented customer service encounters

Siting at my desk, my manager informed me of a mistake... Finishing the lesson with:

"You don't listen"

Isn't it surprising the difference in personal perceptions of a shared experiences

Costco

On  a Sunday afternoon, a woman and I found ourselves at Costco... Standing in front of a case of Kraft macaroni and cheese ... The woman broke down the price of the individual box price... In an argument for the purchase ...,

I could only react by saying: "I do not want share a living space with that much macaroni and cheese"

Truly Want

I had one of the best  convos of my life... The gifted outcome of a random male
meeting... Even if it does not pan out... It was an invaluable experience because it illustrated
what I truly want ... deserve

Halts

What stops me from seeking out an old flame is the determination that  it halts the exploration of a
better fit

Memory Lane

I bought the book, "HE IS JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU", at a used book store ...this past week end

Engaging in the easy read was a trip down memory lane of  most of the stories  about  men that I have ever heard from a women friends

I can not pretend to be ignorant about certain behaviors in connection to me....particularly when the treatment contradicts their words

Straight As

A woman of a straight A student daughter was updating a cousin on her family life.   She described her offspring's bad behavior and did not mention her child's straight As

I tend to do this about myself....starting convos with my failures..." Hi, I am on borrowed time at work"....instead of reporting my improved scores...

Whenever I do this ...I think of the image I send out into the world...how I act will attract the people and respect that will  reinforce the life I want

Market Window

I window shop at the market

Stemming

My job is a disaster and my personal life is filled with emptiness

Yet I have a level of confidence that is new to me

Stemming from admiration for myself for keeping going

Three words

Three words I do not like hearing in a sentence
are breasts .., down.. there ..,

"Creepy"

I threw caution to the wind and went with a random stranger for a bite....
A neighbor reacted to my reported social outing as "creepy"

A woman with a prison boyfriend may loose points in a game of self righteousness

Hydrid

I am exhibiting a new hybrid compulsive behavior....I franticly seek anything is  that slated for the good will by my friends...no bag riding in a car trunk is safe...

I sort the free dry goods and distribute certain selected pieces to people in my circle...a neighbor was an excited receiver of two pairs of shoes...

The second part of the hybrid is that I get tremendous joy out of  releasing my things...filling up a box placed by the door of  my various things lessens my weight and relieves some of my anxiety

Perishables

A man and I were talking in the produce section of "my market"...as he was picking me up he was picking up leafy romaine lettuce....

We decided to go to a nearby restaurant  to talk....he asked me, about mid convo, if  I had any perishables..

Thoughtfulness can go a long way...

Flashbacks

I struggle with my anger... When anger flashbacks are triggered... I malign myself for not being more
advanced...

I have decided that a more positive advancement would be to let myself off
the hook

When I am ready ... The anger will flow away

Promise

I am fueled by the promise of a better day

No Match

A relative was in the hospital ..... I was getting reports ... Reluctant to visit

I went and talked to the hospital staff... The received information  contradicted the reports 

Nothing matches going to the source 

Veg All

My mother captained my college apartment... She furnished it by spending a day at target.. My living quarters was decorated with a collection of what had to be assembled..

Filling the pantry with canned goods was high on her mission.... She bought me cans of "veg all"
The frequency of the words would imply a motto... .. If u run out of money .. U have "veg all"
She would refer it as a fail safe ... Because it was all vegetables as close as a can opener..

I have yet to open a can of "veg all" I always think of donating it
 Every time I am in the canned vegetable isle
I think of my mother

Resulting in ....

The more I spend time with people that are uplifting ...affirming...self starting...clear communicating

I am quicker  to see the contrast of the people that are not that way...the stripping away of the following of my instincts and cultivating self doubt...

Resulting in forming a new more positive normal ...

Yawn

I rarely yawn ... Even with twenty minutes of sleep..... Until this week, I received a failing work
assessment and was informed that a desk neighbor acused me of passing roumers about a manager

From the moment of the emotional colision ... I have been yawning .....
Yawns that invoke my mouth to open wide.... Could this be an affirmation
of  the effects of the disappointment

Minor/Major

I am reinforcing,daily, that my minor changes can create fertility for major
changes

Apple Fritter

While selecting an apple fritter from a market bakery..  I realized I was propping the mini plexiglass door open with my stomach

Wooden Spoon

 Standing at the counter,while navigating a wooden spoon from Tupperware to dinner plate... I decided to divide the anticipated portion in half ... A way  to satisfy the emotional need to have seconds without consuming twice as the food

Personal and Global

Walking... I decided to practice giving myself  the breaks that I give others... Giving myself the benefit of doubts I give others...


Being as kind to ouselves as we are to the people we encounter... Would  change our personal communities and global communities

A New Layer

Residing, for the past three months, in survival mode.... Getting up ... Going to work... Going to bed... Repeat...

The recent awareness that I am not working towards completing a goal... Creating choices... has awakened me

A new layer of motivation is required

Unblocking

Whenever I anticipate not engaging in my habits for any form of time....smoking...sugar...soda .. I become curious about the new feelings I will be unblocking

Treasure

Whenever I think of contacting the Stallion, a man from my past, I tell myself, a treasure does not
do the hunting

Value of It

The value of keeping going is that it gives u a chance to become who you
want to be... and create a life you want to have

Each Morning

I am determined,to wake up each day, closer to achieving self acceptance...
simulating  desired qualities and habits into my daily behavior ... and more at peace
with my past

Porn Purge

Insomnia can lead to all sorts of watching choices. One such restless night prompted me to stumble upon a show about hoarders...

Viewing the purge portion of the show is my
version of porn.... Rare things give me more joy
then donating items from my apartment

Watching their release of  things gives me a vicarious
thrill

Safe Place and Savior

I adopted a family.   I  would give them "welfare boxes" ...boxes ranging from kitchen things...food...clothes.. or hygene products .

It started to feel uncomfortable.. they became more demanding then gracious...I flopped, in a grey zone, with thoughts of their hungry kids


The flopping stopped when I realized that I was striving to become a combined safe place and savior

I need only to be my own safe place and savior...

21

A girl revealed to me that she wanted to be 21 forever... The idea of being frozen in time
and not having the ability to learn what u learn in each additional decade ... Sounds really depressing to me..

Con Game

A woman went into detail about how confident she was... She,then, proceeded to ask me what I thought of her...

Finding your Jolly

A woman and I were discussing our daily concerns. She illustrated the weight and perhaps silliness
of them by pointing out  that she was, at times, forgetting to find her jolly

All Out

I nearly made it... Standing with a woman, outside of the work, I disovled into tears ... The woman
asked me , the reason , I insisted I was fine ...

She responded: It is already starting to flow... You
might,as well,  let it all out ...

Poking

My manager is rumored to be poking one of his employees
.... being on the fringes was a close ( enough) vantage point
to see the damage... One gossiped word at a time ... to the atmosphere

I saw the man and woman having a work conference... A sexually graphic song played in
the background .... It colored the visual

Unrequired

While I was eating food I prepared, I realized it is not required to eat
until I am full

Me or You

I reconnected with a man I met a year ago... He said today,  what he said to a neighbor when I met him,

His verbalized feelings: " I want to grill some hamburgers and hot dogs"

Is it more a reflection about me to wonder why he could not accomplish what would seem to matter to him... within his reach ... Or an evaluation of his level of determination not to master a goal that appears to be such joy to him and his family

Has Not

Focusing on my mistakes has not only not decreased them ... It has flooded me with a fear that what is focused on may expand

Needy One Legged People

I was talking to a one legged woman about shoes... Leave it to me..,
I reported that I, only, have four pairs of shoes... She responded, yeah me to...and I have to throw the
other half away

I verbally mused,  it is to bad that there is not a group
of needy one legged people for donation ...

She laughingly agreed