Emotional Chem Lab

I will be emotionally generous...kind,affirming and thoughtful..to beloveds and strangers alike...
through out my day.  An agenda is not self-evident when I engage in positive verbal behaviors until
a person springs a mean remark on my senses.

Then, I personify a very clear position.  My internal voice will rant a list of  actions that favored the
perpetrator of the social crime..determined that my acts should give me grace and exclude me from
public insults...

Well, an emotional chem lab does not exist..There is not a recipe of behaviors to put into a beaker
to garner results..

Seizing Moments

I met a man. He complimented my communication style. The man was armed with an I-pad.

I wish I would have asked him, to seize the moment and  to tape me.

Being more in the moment  could create a life change

Earth Angel

A woman walked up to me in a public place.  I had not met her.  She said,  " stay who you are..you are on the right path"

Her delivery embodied such a high level of determination  that I wonder if  certain encounters are
evidence of the presence of earth angels... to give us an emotional nudge when we are wading in self
doubt..

A Lone Gay Crush Broke Free..

Bouncers and gay crushes,alike, reviewed my performance as the "best in show"..One lone gay crush

broke free from the crowd and informed me the different ways I could have been better on stage..

He concluded his "friendly suggestions" by affirming his love for me..

There are times when I would like to be loved differently

Verbal Yeast

Ending a sexually charged call nearly left me stymied..fearing causing a reversal..I blurted out 

"well keep it warm"

He started making bread the next day...my words have become a verbal yeast

Partner Selection

People ask me what I want in a partner, I want a person that will understand  my references

Cursing Insomnia

I will be struggling during certain parts of my day...on the mornings when I  am slow to start the day..walking back to an empty apartment..when I need a cure from insomnia

I reach out to people that have said bad things to me.  When I am doing it..I think I know I should care that my behavior is self-destructive..alternatively, I feel relieved to have gotten through  my
rough patch with the diversion of human interaction.

Conversation conclusions are usually completed with a prayer to the heavens for it to be temporary